tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-87277078492429971362023-10-19T09:08:06.361-07:00WORDS IN HIGH DEF"A bold analysis of life issues infusing faith, humor and encouragement."
From marriage and parenting to mental illness: I speak with as much clarity and definition as time and research will allow. Reader input adds the illustrious punch, so I welcome all views.Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.comBlogger126125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-34940409360777591602010-06-06T06:01:00.001-07:002010-06-06T06:01:00.628-07:00Please visit my new site at <a href="http://www.dianemarkins.com/">http://www.dianemarkins.com/</a>. There will be no new posts on this site.<br />
Thanks!<br />
DianeDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-70008285333345843732010-05-30T07:01:00.000-07:002010-05-30T07:01:00.048-07:00My Body, My Responsibility* New posts will only be at <a href="http://wordsinhighdef.com/">WordsInHighDef.com</a> as of June 1. <br />
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"<b>Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon."<i></i></b> ~Doug Larson<br />
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Physicians and other health care professionals are a necessary and tremendously valuable resource. The average Jane isn't educated to distinguish pink eye from allergies or skin cancer from a hairy mole. We need those people. However, we also need to be our own advocates and do a bit of research about worrisome conditions. Those attending to our care are not infallible or omniscient. They are limited to treat and diagnose based upon A. The info we give them, B. What they observe and C. Their personal experience and training. <br />
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My mother-in-law had skin cancer removed from the back of her leg many years ago. There was a graft successfully in place for a long time but in the past couple years it's been opening up. She had a surgical repair a year ago but it never quite healed, despite expert wound care. The plastic surgeon told her they needed to repeat the surgery. When my MIL asked about the value of hyperbaric chamber treatments he was very dismissive but said she could give it a try if she wanted to. She researched, scheduled and underwent a series of treatments. Everyone agreed that it might expedite healing in the upcoming procedure. The day of surgery came and when the doc saw her (before the IV was in place!), he announced that the wound was completely healed and there was no need for surgery. He was surprised and pleased, admitting doctors don't always know best.<br />
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My husband had intensely sharp pains in his leg and after a couple days went to a physical therapist. He was evaluated and sent on to an MD. The doctor examined his leg, poking and prodding. He asked good questions to rule out serious conditions and decided that a round of prednisone would be the best place to start. He wanted to decrease inflammation then recheck. None too excited about this medication, my husband stopped by a chiropractor's office. He was given an evaluation and treatment. The pain has not returned and steroids were not involved in his recovery.<br />
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I had numbness in my leg and after trying a few things the doc sent me to physical therapy but also wanted me to undergo a painful nerve study. The therapist respectfully disagreed, asking me to give his treatment time before taking that next step. It's been weeks but the numbness is slowly receding and I'm getting correction for a back problem I had just learned to live with. <br />
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When my sister-in-law was diagnosed with breast cancer, she researched every option and settled on a plan that incorporated traditional and natural treatments, not blindly following the advice of one person but insisting they work together for the best of both worlds. She remains cancer-free.<br />
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These are just a few personal examples of why we shouldn't simply follow orders like sheep. While I know that researching conditions on the internet can "give us just enough info to make us dangerous" I also know that I'd rather know the right questions to ask. When painful, expensive or risky treatment is prescribed, a second opinion is always wise. This is your body. You own it and God expects good stewardship. Qualified health care professionals appreciate it too.<br />
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Has there been a time you've not followed a doctor's advice? (This isn't doctor bashing time, this is self-responsibility and awareness stories...love ya docs!) Comment at <a href="http://wordsinhighdef.com/">WordsInHighDef.com</a> <br />
Diane MarkinsDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-72738379005426384052010-05-23T07:01:00.000-07:002010-05-23T07:01:00.575-07:00Marriage Longevity Requires Good Humor<strong><em>"Laugher is the closest distance between two people."</em></strong> Comedian Victor Borge <br />
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"I love how you still think he's so funny after all these years." This is a comment I hear on a regular basis from my friends about my husband, Brad. Don't get me wrong, most of them think he's funny but they don't have to listen to him all the time. I believe it's one of the most affirming compliments we could get about our marriage. It always comes when I'm not expecting it, but have just stopped giggling over some stupid thing he's said. I look over and Marilynn (Lavona, Marlene, Chris, Bev, Paula...the list goes on) utters that remark with admiration. <br />
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There are so many critical elements and skills that keep a marriage alive: love, respect, forgiveness, patience, kindness and physical affection to name only a few. But shared humor and laughter top the list. If you can still laugh together all those other things will be by-products. It's impossible to remain angry with someone when they're making you laugh. When they're working to make you smile because they care about your happiness, it demonstrates love. And for me, there's nothing sexier than sharp wit. <br />
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My husband shared his secret with me a while ago. Sometimes he doesn't feel like kidding around, especially when he walks in and I'm clearly not smiling. I may even snap at him because the cat brought in another lizard or the computer went down. Yet he knows that he has the choice, in those first few moments to act or react. If he ignores my mood, not snapping in return--and says something funny, I almost always come around to a lighter mood. For years I was unaware of his intentional effort and the awareness he had of my attitude. Talk about being attentive, sensitive and humble! He know he has the power to set the tone for (and sometimes salvage) our whole evening. <br />
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We all have this ability if we approach relationships sacrificially. When our minds are on our own challenges and focus is inward, it's impossible to be the leader and pace-setter in our intimate relationships. As we learn Brad's secret formula: taking the pulse of our partner, setting our own "stuff" aside, then deliberately infusing a dose of humor, we gain a tremendous advantage. <br />
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I hope this works for you. It's still working for us...we're celebrating our 31st anniversary on May 26th.<br />
Do you agree that laughter and humor are hugely significant in marriage? What other secrets have you learned for relationship longevity? Share comments and see our wedding photo at <a href="http://wordsinhighdef.com/">WordsInHighDef.</a><br />
Diane MarkinsDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-79174225409982331502010-05-16T06:01:00.000-07:002010-05-16T06:01:00.350-07:00Don't Mix Politics With...Well, ANYTHING!"Madness is rare in individuals - but in groups, political parties, nations, and eras it's the rule." Friedrich Nietzsche <br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S-x8rOZ34NI/AAAAAAAAAFw/gNJrUc3OhTk/s1600/lossuns.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="189" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S-x8rOZ34NI/AAAAAAAAAFw/gNJrUc3OhTk/s200/lossuns.jpg" width="200" wt="true" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"></div><br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Politics should stand alone. Politics and sports, politics and religion, politics and entertainment...even politics and (many) friendships should not be paired up. This was crystallized in my mind last week when my beloved Phoenix Suns took a public stand on a controversial issue. Management and players were quoted taking positions opposing recent state legislation regarding illegal immigration. Then, this week Nancy Pelosi urged clergy leaders to do the same. </div><br />
Regardless of your opinion on this, or any other issue, my point is that politics should remain apart from all else. As a Suns fan, we already love our team. They can't improve our devotion by taking a political stance. However, they do risk losing our affectionIf they publicly oppose our politics. This is a no-win for teams. Fans prefer that they play ball, not politics. When they retire they can be politicians. (Right Barkley?)<br />
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There is no law prohibiting clerics from preaching political ideologies, and in fact many do. Our constitution does, however, separate church and state. If Ms. Pelosi decides to address religious leaders, she should encourage and inspire them, not push a divisive political agenda. Each of us is so blessed to live in this great country where our place of worship is a personal choice. I'd be the first one to demonstrate this freedom if my pastor used the pulpit on Sundays to prescribe political allegiances. My seat would be vacant and I'd begin searching for a new church that preached about life, God's love and character—allowing congregants to derive their own political affiliations. <br />
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Some people can easily separate a wonderful singer or actor from his/ her radical (loudly proclaimed) politics. I find that difficult. The entertainment experience is significantly diminished because I can't erase the sound bite from last week's news. I applaud celebrities for doing good works in the community and the world, but spouting politics isn't as admirable or universally productive. <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S-yJh_Fv7kI/AAAAAAAAAF4/33JOfVFrIEA/s1600/2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S-yJh_Fv7kI/AAAAAAAAAF4/33JOfVFrIEA/s320/2.jpg" width="320" wt="true" /></a></div>I think it's ridiculous, if not dangerous, to have only like-minded friends. A lively debate over social issues can be fun and invigorating, but it can also cause hurt feelings and ruined relationships. If done with grace and a watchful eye, we can share opposing views with friends, but there is always a risk. It's probably wiser to keep these topics to a minimum and steer back to things we can agree on, like sports...unless that gets political too!<br />
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Do you think it's effective or helpful to mix politics with anything else? Please post comments at new site. <a href="http://www.dianemarkins.com/">click here</a>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-76786001075023366322010-05-09T06:01:00.000-07:002010-05-09T06:01:00.536-07:00Mother's Day: Lessons in Letting Go<em><span style="font-size: large;">From the moment a child is born his mother begins her journey to let go</span>...</em> <br />
At least that's the way I see it. <br />
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<em>Any good mom’s heart longs to cling to her child. Sometimes we have to be prodded to ease up a bit. Only when it becomes obvious that letting go is the best choice do we relax our iron grip… like the mother in 1 Kings 3: 16-27. As the story goes, two women brought a baby to Solomon. Each woman claimed the baby was her child. "Cut the baby in half and give half of the baby to each woman," Solomon said. "NO!" screamed the real mother, "Give her the baby. Do not kill him." Then Solomon knew who the real mother was because of the sacrificial way she loved the baby. He gave the baby to its real mother.</em> <br />
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My son was only about six month old when I first started teaching him to “swim.” It was sort of a trend at that time to train babies to hold their breath, flip on their backs and float in a pool. Theoretically this would save them if they ever fell in unsupervised. <br />
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It sounds really dumb now, but I was a young mom and since there was a pool almost everywhere we went in Phoenix, I jumped in (pun fully intended) with both feet. Clutching the dearest thing in the world to me, I became paralyzed when the instructor said it was my turn to let him go in the water. She spoke to me like a small child learning to ride a bike. “You can do this…let go…he’ll be OK!” <br />
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With my heart thudding in my ears I finally pried my fingers away from his pudgy little body, blew in his face (so he’d inhale) and released him with a gentle shove toward the instructor. She retrieved him immediately and he emerged with a sputter and a giant grin back at me. Soon, the flip/role/float was mastered with great pride. <br />
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At age four I carefully taught him to ride a horse. When he was thrown in a field, my dad held me back from running to the rescue, instead insisting I help him back in the saddle to complete another lap. “This is a great life lesson,” Dad told me. “He’ll learn courage and not to fear failure if he gets right back up there.” I wanted to grab my little guy and flee, but I lifted him aboard that animal and told him to be brave. He grew to be cautiously bold… neither reckless nor fearful. <br />
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In high school my boy went away to work at a youth camp one summer. They were short-staffed so he was required to work long hours of labor with only one day off each week. He didn’t know anyone, was feeling isolated and exhausted and wanted to come home early. It broke my heart to hear him sound so sad and desperate on the phone, but my husband assured me it was best to make him stay. When he returned home, he thanked us and told us it was a wonderful and life-changing experience. <br />
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David taught his son, Solomon this less as well. "Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you until all the work for the service of the temple of the LORD is finished.” 1 Chronicles 28: 20<br />
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Especially for mothers, the journey of parenting is an ongoing lesson of letting go. We innately want to protect and direct our kids away from pain, danger or discomfort. When they’re grown, these instincts don’t subside, but as we see our kids gain strength, wisdom and courage, it becomes increasingly clear that we must continually release them. It’s a little easier with the assurance that God never lets them go. Perhaps the Lord’s nudging you to relinquish a bit of the grip on your child. He may be saying, “Let go…you can do this…with me, he’ll be OK.”<br />
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And for those blessed enough to still have a mother, perhaps you need to extend an extra measure of grace when she holds a little too tightly. Especially on Mother’s Day, try to receive it as the expression of love it’s meant to be. “Her children rise up and bless her…” Proverbs 31:28<br />
Comment and see a great picture at <a href="http://wordsinhighdef.com/">WordsInHighDef.com</a> .<br />
Diane Markins<br />
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* A special Happy Mother's Day wish to my daughter-in-law who will begin her journey in July when their first baby arrives.Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-90238473082451580862010-05-05T06:01:00.000-07:002010-05-05T06:01:00.187-07:00Bonus Post: Good Comeback... Rebuttal to Cyclist Rant<strong><em>*</em></strong>All new posts will only be on <a href="http://wordsinhighdef.com/">WordsInHighDef.com</a> as of June 1. <br />
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<strong><em>Following is a guest response to my post on April 25th about city cyclists by </em></strong><a href="http://www.graceandtruthrelationship.com/"><strong><em>Jeff Williams</em></strong></a><strong><em>.</em></strong> <br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Playing Well Together, Sharing Our Toys (and roads)</span><br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Dear friends, </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div>I'm sorry to see that some of you have inspired the ire of my friend and increasingly influential writer, Diane Markins. Would you please consider behaving yourselves as much as possible on the streets of Phoenix so that "we" (yes, the collective "we" of road cyclists) might be treated with more respect than disdain? In effect, respect means a better chance to live than to be maimed by drivers incensed by the arrogance of some of us. With that said, I have some rebuttals for you, Ms. Markins.<br />
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Road Hogs -- Bike lanes should be used when available, but sometimes they aren't user-friendly. Why? Drivers throw out trash, including broken glass onto the side of the road. It's not always easy or safe to ride through such debris. To the roadies: Why not drive your bike to less traveled sections of pavement to enjoy less threatening cycling? <br />
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Flow from red lights -- When we hog the road it is usually to protect ourselves. Some driver's can't stand to be delayed 2 seconds by a cyclist approaching a stop sign, so within 20 yards of the intersection they speed up then screech to a halt, endangering themselves and us by the reckless maneuver. If we go into the middle of a lane as we approach intersections we assert our right to obey the same traffic laws as drivers. We also hog the road in order that you might see us, and not try to pass where there is no room. When we hug the side of the road drivers think they have room to pass...not always true. We move out onto the road to protect us from being sideswiped, and you from being charged with a crime. Hogging the road helps to keep you out of jail, and your conscience free of the idiocy of saving five seconds at the cost of a life.<br />
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Blasting past slow traffic -- You've got us here. I've done it. But sometimes it prevents more confusion and problems. For instance, if I "sneak" through a light before it turns green, then you get off the line as fast as you want, and turning cars don't get confused about right of way. However, the hypocrisy of arrogant cyclists that obey traffic laws when convenient can't be ignored. If we truly want to improve our reputation with motorists, this is a great way to do it. Yep, there are no excuses for us on this one, but crowded roads and lengthy waits at intersections is plenty of incentive to take the time to get out to country roads for safer riding for everyone. What? No country in Phoenix? Well, if cycling is that important to you, move somewhere that you can safely enjoy it.<br />
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They don't pay their fair share -- That's a non-starter, in my opinion. The majority of cyclists in the U.S. also own and drive cars. We pay like the rest of you. So what if we're masochistic and want to travel more miles of roadway than if we simply drive pollution machines? <br />
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Finally, the goofy bike attire. Diane, you don't know what you don't know. The goofy attire prevents tremendous pain. Have you ever tried to sit atop the tip of a spear for hours on end? Well, those skinny little seats turn into spears UNLESS there is padding between our sitting area and the saddle, and the padding of cycling shorts comes embedded in tight, bright patterns of sponsors who sometimes greatly subsidize the cost of the clothing. The fact that they are tight-fitting and made of special moisture-wicking material is both a comfort and performance issue. Chafing is averted, and wind resistance is minimized. AND, the bright colors are strategic. They help drivers who are going too fast and doing too many illegal things in their vehicles so that we all can avoid senseless tragedy. What would you propose we wear? Try twenty miles on a road bike in your most comfortable summer attire and I'm sure you'll agree. <br />
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Thank you to the many patient and kind drivers that help us crazy cyclists to enjoy our passion for two-wheels. We hope to improve our reputation and safety by treating you with the same respect that we want to receive. <br />
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Jeff Williams, a roadie in the Midwest<br />
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<strong>OK, so I may be a bit more sympathetic after this explanation, but only when cyclists share the road with good manners! Share your thoughts below. Contact <a href="http://www.graceandtruthrelationship.com/contact.html">Jeff here.</a> </strong><br />
<strong>Diane Markins</strong>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-9314772303506800252010-05-02T06:01:00.001-07:002010-05-02T06:01:00.314-07:00Cyclists: Share The Road With A Car (Please?)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.infrastructurist.com/wp-content/uploads/pothole-bicyclist-crash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="http://www.infrastructurist.com/wp-content/uploads/pothole-bicyclist-crash.jpg" width="200" wt="true" /></a></div>"<b>Get a bicycle. You will not regret it if you live</b>." ~Mark Twain, <i>Taming the Bicycle </i><br />
Warning: This post is going to be a bit of a gripe session so feel free to tune out at will. One of my biggest pet peeves is the attitude of some bicyclists on the streets. Yes, I know how green they all are and they aren't contributing to higher health insurance costs because they're so fit! <br />
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I'm sorry but those feel-good factors for the positive column don't come close to balancing out the negative side of the equation in my book. I'll elaborate and share the things that bug me most about <i>many<b></b></i> (<i>not all<b></b></i>) city cyclists. <br />
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They're road hogs. Many city streets now have bike lanes designated strictly for their use (and go largely unoccupied because there is a relatively small part of the population using them). However I frequently have to make dangerous maneuvers into the next lane to avoid the guys who always ride just on the white line. It strikes me as arrogant and inconsiderate. New bumper sticker: Share the road with a car!<br />
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They disrupt the flow of movement away from red lights. They take up position in the middle of the street (along with motorized vehicles) at traffic lights. When the light turns green they begin to peddle at speeds much slower than surrounding cars. This presents a hazard for nearby automobiles. <br />
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They remain in the bike lane (when it's convenient) and blast past slow traffic as well as intersecting side streets. It's really difficult to see them coming when making a right turn and they're approaching from the rear at a great rate of speed on the right. Blind spot!<br />
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Even the goofy bike attire annoys me. It just screams, "I'm a real cyclist...I'm not an amateur...and I've got the tacky, pricey clothes to prove it!"<br />
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They don't pay their fair share. Taxes and fees related to driving a car help pay for road maintenance but cyclists use it for free. Drivers pay for accident insurance. Statistics on auto accidents caused by cyclists are sketchy but based on the many near-misses I've witnessed, I'm convinced there have to be a significant number of them.<br />
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They disregard traffic signals, often going through red lights and running stop signs. I'm sure it's inconvenient to come to a stop and have to put the effort into restarting but isn't the effort and workout a part of the enjoyment? Traffic laws are for everyone, not merely a suggestion.<br />
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I know there are drivers who can be total jerks to cyclists as well. They honk and drive too close to the bike lane adding fuel to the flame of discord that already exists. That's unacceptable, but I'm not one of them. I follow traffic laws as well as rules of common courtesy. I'm working on a kinder attitude about this...but on my way home today (once again) a cyclist darted in front of me at an intersection then gave me a one finger salute accompanied by words I won't mention when I had to slam on my brakes to avoid a collision. I'm hoping God will soften my heart in the issue of this pet peeve (forgive me, biking friends!) and will protect me from a cyclist related accident. Any near-misses you'd like to share or other pet peeves to vent? Comment below.<br />
Diane Markins<br />
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*Check back Wednesday for a rebuttal post by avid cyclist and marriage coach Jeff Williams.Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-31574031826801208372010-04-25T06:01:00.000-07:002010-04-25T06:01:01.205-07:00Ducks In The Pool: Finding Joy In Unexpected Places<b>"... joy and sorrow are inseparable. . . together they come and when one sits alone with you . . . remember that the other is asleep upon your bed." </b>Kahlil Gibran<br />
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This morning my yorkie-poo alerted me that something was going on in the back yard. His barking wasn't the usual yapping to greet a dog walking near our fence. When I went to investigate I saw him doing manic laps around the pool, looking up frequently to see if I was paying attention. He had discovered invaders and was beside himself with the thrill of it. A pair of mallards had decided to enjoy a swim and Rocky wasn't sure what to do about it. <br />
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After a few minutes of side-splitting laughter I encouraged him to go swimming to "get the ducks." This is a funny little dog who loves to swim and retrieve balls so he went for it, even though the ducks were nearly as big as he is. Naturally the annoyed birds flew off, leaving Rocky behind, victorious. <br />
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Rocky's buddy Ziggy, our sweet Rottweiler, went to doggie heaven about a month ago. When Zig was in the yard ducks and neighborhood cats didn't venture near. Now things are different— for Rocky and for all of us in the Markins family. We miss Ziggy and when there is a void that big, things change. Rocky has been mopey, he's taken to making a fast break into the neighborhood when the door is open and dumps the trash can over when he's left alone. <br />
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But then today there were ducks! He was filled with the joy of a new and exciting experience. I've started taking him to work with me (at our business) when I have a short day. Something that wasn't feasible with Ziggy. He also gets more car rides and 100% of the doggie love lavished at our house. <br />
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For my little mutt and for all of us there is unexpected joy to be found in the wake of grief and disappointment. When there is discord in one relationship it may forge an even closer bond in another relationship as you seek comfort and direction. If you get sick you have time to appreciate health, which will hopefully come again. In a bad economy you learn to rediscover simple pleasures and find out that possibly you have been squandering money when it was plentiful. Or maybe that's just my experience? <br />
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Are you stuck in a sad, angry or bored place? Rather than dumping the trash over (and ticking everyone off) start looking for ducks. There is probably unexpected joy ahead in your own backyard. Share your unexpected joy experiences below.<br />
Diane MarkinsDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-69203905685486308072010-04-18T06:01:00.000-07:002010-04-18T06:01:00.340-07:00Tiger: So Tired of Hearing His Name...He Finally Owes ME An Apology<em><strong>"You shall not misuse the name of the LORD your God, for the LORD will not hold anyone guiltless who misuses his name."</strong></em> - Exodus 20:7<br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="http://images.sportsnetwork.com/golf/getty/men/tiger/2009/aus_masters200.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://images.sportsnetwork.com/golf/getty/men/tiger/2009/aus_masters200.jpg" width="157" wt="true" /></a>Tiger! Tiger! Tiger! Is it just me or is anyone else tired of hearing about this man? He's a tremendously talented golfer. I get it. He was very popular and living a charmed life. It began to come apart a bit when the world (yes even in remote villages of Africa I'm sure they're discussing it!) discovered he wasn't such a nice guy. He was cheating on his wife—his family—for years in a flagrant way. Got it. The networks interrupt regular programming when he holds a press conference. Why? What's so important for all of us to hear him say? I haven't heard a single thing that inspires or even interests me yet. Please be done!</div><br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">As he repeats the same "I'm sorry" speech, reworked for the occasion, I don't feel like I need to be listening. He didn't hurt my feelings or betray my trust, because I didn't have feelings or trust him to begin with. For those who invest emotions in movie stars or athletes to whom they have no actual relationship, reconsider. If you do choose this path, invest a little more wisely. Adore them more for their true, proven character than for their talents or perceived charisma. You'll be much less at risk and won't feel the need for repeated promises of repentance from a fallen star. </div><br />
It was a little disgusting to me to see the slobbering affection this man received at the Master's last weekend. As he walked the course fans cheered and shouted to welcome him back like a wounded hero returning from the war. Not even Phil Mickelsen who was playing in spite of a difficult year of supporting his wife's breast cancer battle got this kind of love. Wow!<br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="http://www.telegraphindia.com/1040413/images/13masters2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="184" src="http://www.telegraphindia.com/1040413/images/13masters2.jpg" width="200" wt="true" /></a>I've heard all about how Tiger's gotten help for his addiction and anger issues. He's going to be more Zen on the course and may return to his peaceful Buddhist roots. Good for him. Maybe that's just what he needs. But if that's true, perhaps he should begin by choosing another way of expressing his frustration or disappointment while playing. Twice the mic picked up, loud and clear, this new and improved Tiger use MY God's name as an expletive. Now that's cause for him to give me an apology. I do take that personally and doubt he noticed or cared. </div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Congratulations to a wonderful athlete and a seemingly decent guy, Phil Mickelsen.</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">Your thoughts on Tiger, misplaced hero-worship or other related issues?</div>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-35051044052558337682010-04-11T06:01:00.000-07:002010-04-11T06:01:00.973-07:00Ziggy and Me...Responding to God's Whispers<b>"I held a moment in my hand, brilliant as a star, fragile as a flower, a tiny sliver of one hour. I dripped it carelessly, Ah! I didn't know, I held opportunity." </b>~Hazel Lee<br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S7526yZZg_I/AAAAAAAAAFo/mqgmLtrAkZ0/s1600/ziggie09001_crop.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S7526yZZg_I/AAAAAAAAAFo/mqgmLtrAkZ0/s200/ziggie09001_crop.jpg" width="149" wt="true" /></a>The day of departure was drawing near and Ziggy, our aging Rottweiler was losing strength and mobility in her legs. The doggie doc encouraged me to "give it a little more time" as he believed she could turn a corner and recover enough to live a good while longer. </div><br />
When your family grows up, it also grows apart. Everyone has busy and varied schedules. This was a rare and special family trip to the dunes planned, with all our motor toys, where most of my family would be present. My kids, my parents, my inlaws and some friends were all looking forward to a great time together. A couple days before the trip God whispered in my ear that I should stay home.<br />
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How could I expect a dog sitter to deal with special needs and possible complications? Would anyone care as much or be as attentive as I to her pain and basic necessities? Huh uh. So I reluctantly announced my decision to stay home. My husband felt terrible but the vacation wouldn't happen if he stayed home because he was in charge of bringing the base RV and biggest toy. I encouraged him to go ahead with the trip as planned.<br />
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The first night was rough because she was having a lot of pain and could only stand up with my help. I didn't get much sleep and prayed fervently for her sudden improvement. The next day she went into a rapid decline and by evening was unable to get up, stand or walk without help. Lifting a 100 pound dog from the floor, then partially carrying her outside is as difficult as it sounds. I had to call on kind friends about every two hours all through the night to come help me take her outside for potty breaks. She was hurting and exhausted. I knew it was her last night.<br />
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In the morning I lay on the floor looking into her eyes as the vet administered the concoction that would end her suffering. I stroked her face and promised her all her favorite things, "You'll have treats, go for walks, go for rides and go swimming." She looked back into my face and responded with familiar expressions (albeit subdued) until the light was gone, and so was she.<br />
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It was brutally painful and I hated it...but I wouldn't have traded it for a month of family vacation. I comforted her, loved her and stood by her until her last moment. God had me there for "such a time as this." The rest of the family, especially my husband, was protected from having to see her suffer and I was blessed to be there to make a crucial decision and stay with her until she was gone. <br />
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I'm grateful for God's whisper and so glad I listened and obeyed, for it would have all been much different if I had left her in someone else's charge. Have you had to make a choice like mine? Has He been whispering to you lately? What opportunities might you miss if you don't listen? Share below?<br />
Diane MarkinsDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-25856607725711962092010-04-04T06:01:00.000-07:002010-04-04T06:01:00.967-07:00Easter: It's All About MeAs a little girl I loved Easter. What's not to love? My sister and I always got a new "Easter outfit" which included a frilly dress of our choosing, lacy socks, shiny new patent leather mary janes, a hat and even little white gloves. No, I'm not nearing 80, that's just the way my mom wanted to do things. <br /><br />Coloring enough eggs to exhaust a barnyard of chickens, we were artistic geniuses. The night before the big day we'd be filled with butterflies of anticipation for the beautiful, loaded basket that giant rabbit would drop off in exchange for the large carrot left as an offering of gratitude...and yes, we believed! <br /><br />Up at dawn, we'd marvel at the lovely loot bestowed upon us and eat a few pieces of candy before breakfast. Church was fun because we got to show off our new clothes and find out how much the Big Bunny liked other kids. <br /><br />Off to Grandma's house for Easter egg hunts until the last adult finally said no more. Aunts, uncles, cousins and grandparents sat down to a table laden with what we now call comfort food. Throughout the day we were depleting our stash as the marshmallow peeps, chocolate bunnies, jelly beans and malted milk eggs were consumed. <br /><br />Um...and there was something about Jesus. Any of this sounding familiar?<br /><br />I'm not one to condemn any tradition that results in family togetherness and forming sweet memories, but perhaps there's a better way. I realize now that the Easter celebration I grew up with was all about me: my appearance, my stash of goodies, my fun day. <br /><br />Honestly, it's still all about me...at least that's what Jesus would say. He lived in our challenging, abusive, hurt-filled world <em>for me</em>. He died a brutal death, at the hands of hateful people <em>for me</em>. He defeated death and lives on, <em>for me</em>. Romans 5:8 says, "But God demonstrates His love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."<br /><br />For those who love the fun family traditions like I grew up with, maybe there could be two days of Easter celebrations. Perhaps Good Friday or even on Saturday, we could spend a little time remembering this man who brought each of us so much more than a wicker basketful of colored sugar. We could deliberately try to relate to Jesus by recalling our own (comparably shallow) experiences of pain and sacrifice for others. We could spend some time being still, soaking in God's eternal expression of love that encompassed the very first Easter. <br /><br />"Oh, give thanks to the LORD! Call upon His name; Make known His deeds among the peoples! ..." Psalm 105:1. We could write Him a sincere letter of thanks. We could teach our kids to draw a picture or use other artistic methods to create a gift expressing grateful hearts. <br /><br />Our wonderful God doesn't want us to throw away fun times or eliminate lasting traditions or replace them with a stiff, obligatory religious ritual. He loves to see us smile, hug and enjoy treats. But I believe He'd delight even more in the way our spirits would respond to an intentional interlude basking in His presence. Not for His sake because <em>Easter is all about us</em>. <br /><br />How do you separate the fun traditions and the true meaning of Easter? What was your Easter like growing up? Comment below.<br />Diane MarkinsDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-872293617307113332010-03-28T06:01:00.000-07:002010-03-29T15:07:10.769-07:00ObamaCare Won: How Will You Respond?<a target="_blank" href="http://www.amazon.com/Slobbering-Love-Affair-Pathetic-Mainstream/dp/1596980907?ie=UTF8&tag=w000d-20&link_code=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969">A Slobbering Love Affair: The True (And Pathetic) Story of the Torrid Romance Between Barack Obama and the Mainstream Media</a><img src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=w000d-20&l=btl&camp=213689&creative=392969&o=1&a=1596980907" width="1" height="1" border="0" alt="" style="border:none !important; margin:0px !important; padding: 0px !important" /><strong>Who's Really In Control? </strong><br />
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Well, they finally did it. The democrats passed their healthcare legislation. As with every big political issue, the aftermath is a different experience depending upon how you're wired and what you hoped for. I'd like to, in the spirit of good sportsmanship, offer congratulations to those who are celebrating and especially to those who have invested time and energy to see this come to fruition. <br />
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That said, I'm not one of the party-goers this week. I'm not angry (as I've heard from many others) or sad or even fearful. I will admit being disappointed. I'm sorry that those who represent us can't come a little closer to common ground. The biggest problem is that there isn't a unified "us" to represent. There is a divided "us" and some elected officials represent the beliefs of one half while others represent the remaining half. <br />
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It's easy to blame politicians for the discord that's so flagrant in the US. But in truth, they're elected and paid to give voice to what we demand. And this divisiveness isn't unique to our country. It's world-wide and it's as old as recorded history. Humans tend to thrive on it. You only have to watch a basketball game during March Madness to know that we love to pick sides and passionately align ourselves there. <br />
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I realize enthusiasm for a sports team doesn't remotely equate to the significance of being committed to a major political initiative like that which was approved last week, but we do tend to take wins and losses personally regardless of the relevance. However, just as the loss of an important game, we have to put this one behind us and move forward with purpose and grace.<br />
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I'll be honest and confess that I have grave concerns regarding the effects this legislation will cause. I'm deeply concerned about our senior population. I dread losing some of my favorite docs who say they'll find another profession or retire. I'm not looking forward to the long waits and inferior care that I suspect I'll be subjected to for medical attention. As a business owner I know there will be a mountain of paperwork required to verify that we're in compliance with the new insurance mandates. Yuck!<br />
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But in spite of all my reservations, still I will be intentional to remind myself that God is sovereign and this outcome did not surprise Him. He works all things out for good and we can trust Him. In the meantime if you're not in the winner's camp on this one, be a gracious loser and continue to fight the good fight.<br />
Diane Markins<br />
Share your opinions here.Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-48579968725117643152010-03-21T06:01:00.000-07:002010-03-21T06:01:00.508-07:00Peaceful Families Can Happen: Overcoming Emotional & Physical Abuse <strong>No More Emotional or Physical Abuse! </strong>
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<br />It was such an honor to be a guest on the inaugural Blog Talk radio program called <a href="http://redroseministry.net/faithandlove/2010/03/19/inaugural-blogtalk-radio-show/">Peaceful Families Hour</a> on March 18th. Sabrina Evans Laurence, of <a href="http://www.redroseministry.org/">Red Rose Ministry</a>, worked diligently for a year to persuade the governor of her home state of Maryland to declare an official Peaceful Families Day. That very day, Governor Martin O' Malley handed down the proclamation. Laurence aspires to make this a national decree to help inspire families to turn away from physical and emotional abuse.
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<br />I shared about creating and modeling a peaceful family. Far from perfect, my family has fumbled through the years, maintaining peace only because God was leading the way. These are the top ten skills/lessons I'd like to hand down from experience:
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<br />· When you argue, learn to "fight fairly"...that means no name-calling, no accusing, no yelling. When things heat up, take a break and return to the discussion later.
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<br />· Determine and pinpoint the real issue and don't stray into other topics or older conflicts.
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<br />· Remember that winning the argument is less important that winning God's pleasure (be humble).
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<br />· Grace and forgiveness <em>aren't optional</em> (to give and to be received). When our loved ones mess up we need to immediately give them comfort. Natural consequences will still occur to teach a much better lesson than our anger.
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<br />· Respect is the centerpiece to keeping peace in a family. Earn it and give it liberally.
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<br />· Finding purpose as individuals leads to contentment. Contented people are easier to get along with, so pursue being one.
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<br />· Keep your eyes on the prize. Shared faith in Christ (by believing His promises, His ability to change things and by following the blueprint for peace layed out in the Bible) can be sustaining. Being on the same page where faith is concerned brings unity and ultimately peace.
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<br />· Set healthy boundaries with clear consequences...and follow through. Empty threats never work.
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<br />· Never let fear determine your actions or rule your life. When we operate out of fear, we make skewed choices. God didn't give us a spirit of fear but of faith. Make bold, fearless choices to maintain peace.
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<br />· <em>HELP!</em> Just like the old Beatles tune says, "Help me get my feet back on the ground." Sometimes we reach an impasse that seems insurmountable. Whether in a tumultuous, desperate family situation or a family that is on track but wants to continue building a model for peace, there are wonderful resources. I've listed some below.
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<br />Do you have a peaceful or abusive family story to share? Any tips you'd like to add? Share below.
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<br />Diane Markins
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<br /><strong>Suggested Resources for Maintaining a Peaceful Family </strong>
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<br />Websites and Supportive Organizations
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<br /><a href="http://www.focusonthefamily.com/">http://www.focusonthefamily.com/</a>
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<br />http://www.graceandtruthrelationship.com/ (Grace and Truth Relationships, marriage coaching & coach training)
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<br />http://<a href="http://www.familydynamics.net/">www.familydynamics.net</a>/ (Family Dynamics Institute)
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<br />www.HealthyChildren.org</a>/">HealthyChildren.org</a> - Family in Crisis
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<br />http://<a href="http://www.family-crisis.com/">www.family-crisis.com/</a> (Family Crisis Support Services)
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<br />Books
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<br /><a href="http://www.familydynamics.net/becbook.htm">Becoming One: Emotionally, Spiritually, Sexually</a> by Joe Beam
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<br /><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Love-Respect-Workbook-Emerson-Eggerichs/dp/1591453488/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1269108937&sr=1-1">
<br />Love and Respect</a> by Emerson Eggerichs and Fritz Ridenour
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<br /><a href="http://www.amazon.com/His-Needs-Her-Building-Affair-Proof/dp/0800717880/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1269108865&sr=1-1">
<br />His Needs, Her Needs</a> by Willard F. Harley
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<br /><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Building-Christian-Family-You-Never/dp/1400070317/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1269108825&sr=1-1">Building the Christian Family You Never Had: A Practical Guide for Pioneer Parents</a> by Mary E. DeMuth
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<br /><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Grace-Based-Parenting-Dr-Tim-Kimmel/dp/0849905486/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1269108773&sr=1-1">Grace-Based Parenting</a> by Tim Kimmel
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<br /><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Making-Children-without-Losing-Yours/dp/B002KMJ0EI/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1269108715&sr=1-1-spell">Making Children Mind without Losing Yours</a> by Kevin Leman
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<br /><a href="http://www.amazon.com/New-Dare-Discipline-James-Dobson/dp/0842305068/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1269108618&sr=8-1">The New Dare to Discipline</a> by James C. Dobson
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<br /><a href="http://johntrentstrongfamilies.blogspot.com/">John Trent's StrongFamilies</a>
<br /> Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-88577028814473823962010-03-14T06:01:00.000-07:002010-03-14T07:11:58.348-07:00Progressing Through StormsAs my husband and I sat on the balcony of our rented condo overlooking a large expanse of ocean, it was a sunny and peaceful day. The waves in Rocky Point, Mexico on the Baja pennisula are typically small and the water is calm. That was Thursday.<br /><br />Saturday and Sunday presented a vastly different picture. We couldn't sit outside because of extreme wind and rain. The previously sedate blue water transformed into pounding waves with angry white tops. The water and sky were matching shades of gray and there wasn't a human form in site. <br /><br />Interestingly, the birds (and presumably sea critters) weren't phased at all. They continued to go about the business of life. The gulls and pelicans coasted with the updrafts and dove into the chilly water to snatch tasty morsels. Finches and sparrows splashed around in little puddles on deck looking for crumbs from the night before. None of them seemed to fear the storm or cowered away, waiting for the turmoil to end before resuming their plight. <br /><br />Surfers and scuba divers mimic these water-loving creatures. Whether there is rain slashing down or the surging waters roil around them, these sea enthusiasts aren't diverted. <br /><br />We could all take a lesson from them. Most of us get our jobs done without too much difficulty when our surroundings are calm, but when the storms of life hit, we lose focus and let our obligations and purposes slip through our shaking hands. Instead of continuing on with life as planned, we become distracted and let the prevailing winds of our emotions determine our actions. <br /><br />Inclemate weather is a certainty for everyone and it will likely come at inconvenient, unexpected times. While preparation helps tremendously, there are some storms we must simply face head-on without the benefit of shelter or respite. The loss of a job, death of a loved one, diagnosis of disease or broken relationships can strike us with hurricane impact. Our knees buckle and the brutal force continues to assault us with no sunshine in sight.<br /><br />While He never promised us we'd always have sunny skies and pleasant breezes, God did promise us He'd walk by our side through every kind of weather and hold us up when we couldn't battle the beating wind and rain alone. Don't lose sight of that promise in the midst of your own storm. Continue to move forward and toward the calm that is sure to come...followed by a spectacular rainbow. <br /><br />What kind of storms has God taken you through? Comment by clicking on "comments" below.<br />Diane Markins<br />*Congrats to Jeff and Jill Williams who won a copy of <a href="http://irebuqui.notlong.com">One Million Arrrows </a>by posting a comment and being drawn from last week's post about teaching our kids to change the world.Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-48733925438770622082010-03-07T06:01:00.000-08:002010-03-07T06:01:00.291-08:00One Million Arrows (Teaching Kids to Change the World)<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S41U4SAITtI/AAAAAAAAAFg/hdOLUsxTuIs/s1600-h/julie_ferwerda_150px.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 150px; height: 176px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S41U4SAITtI/AAAAAAAAAFg/hdOLUsxTuIs/s200/julie_ferwerda_150px.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5444100850442587858" /></a><br /><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S41U30VCEJI/AAAAAAAAAFY/EyvHuQ1Zyh4/s1600-h/oma_cover_flat_200px.jpg"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 129px; height: 200px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_OGwfAbITGVw/S41U30VCEJI/AAAAAAAAAFY/EyvHuQ1Zyh4/s200/oma_cover_flat_200px.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5444100842477195410" /></a><br /><strong>"Will the world change our children...or will our children change the world? Time is short and lives are at stake. Right now, God is inviting our families to become part of a bigger story—a vision that will engage hearts to make a radical difference. One Million Arrows is an inspirational call to raise our kids to impact their culture, community, and world for Christ."</strong> Julie Ferwerda from <em><strong>One Million Arrows </strong></em><br /><br />There is a battle scene in one of my favorite movies, <em>Last of the Mohicans</em>, in which the English are fighting with the local colonists. The English soldiers line up in parade-like formation, take slow aim and fire at their opponents. It's all very civilized. <br /><br />But we know the outcome: Those rude, wild Americans fought in an uncouth style...sneaking around and shooting willy-nilly, ultimately sending the English Red Coats sailing back across the pond <em>defeated</em>. <br /><br />As Christian parents, most of us have been raising our kids with a very clear and organized plan. We take them to church on Sundays, drop them off at AWANA, write an occassional check to the youth program and hope for the best. We say grace at mealtimes and share how God has blessed us around the Thanksgiving dinner table. It's all been prescribed and we're following our marching orders. <br /><br />The problem is that our enemy doesn't fight by the same rules. He's sneaky and goes after our kids in random, surprising ways. We need a new battle plan in which we are prepared for attacks in unexpected places and our guns are blazing from every-which-way. <br /><br /><em><strong><a href="http://onemillionarrows.com/The-Book/">One Million Arrows </a></strong></em>(WinePress), by Julie Ferwerda, lays out the complacent path toward destruction we are traveling, bringing deep conviction. She offers stories and reliable statistics about how children are growing up, and <em>growing away </em>from the faith of their youth. <br /><br />Inspiration for the book came from the vision of Dr. M.A. Thomas, a man known around the world as "Papa." During an extended visit to India, Ferwerda spent time with this humble man and grabbed his vision with both hands. His vision was to "<strong><em>Gather</em></strong> one million broken branches--the native-born, orphaned, and abandoned children--<strong><em>sharpen</em></strong> them with education, faith and a heart for The Great Commission (Matthew 28:18-20), and <strong><em>launch</em></strong> them like arrows back into all the regions of India that have never heard about Jesus...or the world."<br /><br /><em>The Enemy wishes nothing more than to coax our kids, if not into rebellion, into pursuing passionless, insignificant, and potentially empty lives. As long he he can hamstring them with apathy, he need not worry about them doing damage to his kingdom. But now, like Papa, we've been given the exciting opportunity to raise arrows--weapons of warfare. Our kids [and those we have influence over] have been put on this earth for great puropose and a mission.</em> P 21-22 <em><strong>OMA</strong></em><br /><br />In <strong><em>OMA</em></strong>, Ferwerda doesn't stop at stomping on our hearts to reveal the damage we may have done or the opportunities we've missed. She doesn't leave us feeling sad and desperate. Through story after story of families who've been employing this philosophy, we are built back up and inspired with a game plan. Our children, their children and the future of God's good purposes are not lost because we can step back into the battle with new armor and fresh strategies. The message is clear: <strong><em>It's never too late</em></strong>.<br /><br />I hope people with and without young children will read <strong><em>One Million Arrows</em></strong>. Each of us has a potential role to play in gathering, sharpening and launching the weapons God surrounds us with each day. Buy the book at <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1606150111?ie=UTF8&tag=juliefercom-20&link_code=as3&camp=211189&creative=373489&creativeASIN=1606150111">Amazon</a>. Give one to the parents you know. Give one to your pastor and children's ministry workers. (*All proceeds from OMA go to international orphan ministry) Use the <a href="http://onemillionarrows.com/Resources/">resources on the website</a>. This isn't just a book, it's our collective mission as Believers.<br /><br />Share your thoughts, concerns and experiences about raising (and influencing) kids that will change the world. You'll automatically be entered in a drawing to win a free copy of the book. Check back for the winner at the bottom of the post on March 14. Contact me if it's you! <br />Diane MarkinsDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-71111266021123019022010-02-28T06:00:00.000-08:002010-02-28T14:19:10.416-08:00What Powers Your Internal Goal Engine? Is Positive Thinking Enough?"If you will just believe it's true Then there is nothing you can't do. There's not a mountain that you can't climb. There's not a river you can't make it over. There's no tomorrow that you can't find-- if you try I know you're gonna make it... Nothing can stop you now! <br />Tillie the Little Engine: <em>I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!</em>" from <em>The Little Engine That Could </em>by Watty Piper <br /><br />In this classic children's book the main character is a little train engine built only for pulling a few cars on and off the switches, certainly not for large loads over rough terrain. As the story goes, a long line of cars with heavy cargo needs to get to the next station over a steep hill. The leader asks many of the large, powerful engines to pull them but they all decline because the job is too difficult. The little engine agrees, responding (and continually chanting) "I think I can..."<br /><br />The theme of the story focuses on the power of positive thinking. While I am a big fan of thinking positively I believe it often requires more than an uplifted attitude to accomplish difficult tasks. <br /><br />We are all driven by an internal engine. (This was recently pointed out in a <a href="http://www.graceandtruthrelationship.com.">marriage coaching class </a>I'm taking...thanks Jeff Williams for the inspiration.) We have unique dreams, goals and desires. But what what fuels your engine? As you press forward making your way up the steep incline of obstacles and dream-killers, what keeps you going? Is positive thinking enough to continue the forward progress or do you rely on other factors?<br /><br />My engine runs best on affirming words. When people I respect and care about tell me I'm doing well or that they appreciate my work, that's good for another few painful miles on my journey. Or when a stranger tells me I've touched them and made a difference in their life, I'm willing to suffer because I know I'm not doing it in vain. Momentum continues.<br /><br />For some people necessity is the juice they need. Knowing that you won't have food or electricity can be hugely motivating to remain in a job you hate. <br /><br />Here is a list of a few other power sources to fuel the internal engine:<br /><br />Respect from others --Knowing that our effort brings respect from others makes a difference.<br /><br />Respect for others --If we know we'll be letting a respected friend down, we may keep going a few miles further toward our destination.<br /><br />Honoring God --When we believe our perseverance pleases God, it makes the way a little lighter.<br /><br />Appreciation --A few words of genuine gratitude from a loved one can re-ignite our spark plugs.<br /><br />Focusing on our final arrival --It sometimes helps to create a mental picture of what it will look like when we've reached out goal. <br /><br />These energy sources may not be right to fuel <em><strong>your</strong></em> internal engine. It destroys a diesel engine to use gasoline. Double A batteries won't fit in a 9 volt slot. Each of us needs to discern the most effective and efficient fuel for our unique motor, then go about filling up. What keeps your engine running smoothly up hills and over bumpy roads?<br /><a href="http://www.dianemarkins.com">Diane Markins</a>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-43625757025021964372010-02-21T06:00:00.000-08:002010-02-21T06:00:01.746-08:00Training for Eternity"The God who created us to do good works (Eph 2:10) will not cancel this purpose when he resurrects us to inhabit the new universe." Randy Alcorn, <em><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Heaven-Randy-Alcorn/dp/0842379428">Heaven</a></em><br /><br /><em></em>Each day we are in training. For those of us who believe that life doesn't end when we take our final breath on earth, this is a fact. As we open our eyes in the morning we are presented with new opportunities to become stronger, wiser, kinder...better. <br /><br />Our time in this life is simply our practice field for eternity. It may seem like life is long and as we enter our senior years, we should be able to rest. But according to time on an everlasting scale, this life is only a blip. There is no point in time to assume we're done or we've "arrived." God has a purpose for each of us as long as we are drawing breath. He has created us with specific gifts and passions. If we aren't cultivating, honing and applying them, we're wasting precious time and resources. <br /><br />According to the Bible, we aren't going to be sitting around on cloud-covered furniture watching Angel TV in heaven. We'll be working. This was clearly established when God told Adam to pick up that first hoe. (There are a million jokes slamming around in my brain right now, but they're too easy.)<br /><br />Travel, recreation and fun times are all good things. We need refreshment for our weary spirits before we dig in again. Those peaceful or laughter-filled occassions can also be great because they enrich us and make us more complete. <br /><br />But when we are lazy, complaining or passing the hours engaged in activities that we aren't meant to be doing, we will be less prepared for the assignment we get tomorrow and tommorow and in heaven. If your heart's desire is to be a farmer but you spend your days as a mailman, you may be missing the target.<br /><br />Learning the uquique gifts you've been given is a good starting block. Looking for opportunities to enhance and use those <a href="http://mintools.com/gifts-list.htm">spiritual gifts </a>is the essential next step. God has a path layed out for us. It is filled with little growth assignments. If we stray, we don't grow. <br /><br />For those who are fulfilled and contented in how they spend their days, pray for those who aren't. If you don't feel like you're training for your next assignment, visit your pastor or consider reading the <em><a href="http://www.purposedrivenlife.com/en-US/Home/home.htm">Purpose Driven Life </a></em>(or any number of other books on the topic). <br /><br />Is your time well spent? How do you know? Love to hear your thoughts.<br />Diane MarkinsDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-86028984714433732012010-02-14T06:00:00.000-08:002010-02-14T06:00:01.997-08:00Funny Minus Mean/Nasty=Entertainment<strong>"You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it."</strong><a href="http://www.basicquotations.com/index.php?quote=8816" target="_blank"><strong>-</strong> Bill Cosby </a><br /><br />It's Valentine's Day so where's the love? Not at American Idol, at least for now. The results are in and, while the exact numbers may vary, it seems clear that the popularity of American Idol will suffer when <a href="http://www.blogger.com/www.cnn.com/2010/SHOWBIZ/TV/01/11/cowell.../index.html%20-%20Cached">Simon Cowell </a>is no longer on the show. That, in and of itself is nothing to write about. But it seems to me that this is an indicator of something culturally significant: We enjoy meanness.<br /><br />Some may simply love the way he looks or his accent, but most will admit the reason they love Simon is that he's unabashedly unkind. I will offer a disclaimer, I don't watch the program. I've mentioned in previous posts that reality TV or "reality competitive" TV is not my preference. But it is impossible to live anywhere with prime time access and not be exposed to clips and teasers revealing the attacks that level many aspiring singers. I can't change the channel fast enough. For others it's a guilty pleasure and some simply sit back and revel in the carnage.<br /><br />Comedian <a href="http://www.blogger.com/www.popeater.com/2010/01/05/kathy-griffin-banned-from-cnn/%20-%20Cached">Kathy Griffin </a>perfectly exemplifies the use of mean-spiritedness as entertainment. She slams everyone in the most hateful way imaginable. And still her popularity grows.<br /><br />In stark contrast to the use of this method is <a href="http://www.dead-frog.com/comedians/comic/sinbad/" target="_blank">Sinbad</a>, a comedian who doesn't disparage anyone, uses no profanity and yet audiences roar with laugher. We saw this man recently at the Tempe Improv and he captivated the full house. It takes tremendous creativity and hard work to be funny without referring to sex, naked body parts, bathroom experiences or spewing hate-filled sentiments about others. When it's accomplished successfully it brings not only laughter but joy and refreshment to our spirit.<br /><br />What do you think is funny or entertaining? Do you think it's more challenging to provide entertainment while not tearing down others or using profanity? Maybe I'm wrong...let me know why or why not below.<br /><a href="http://www.dianemarkins.com/">Diane Markins</a>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-40551729264553997992010-02-07T06:00:00.000-08:002010-02-18T06:42:05.524-08:00Animal House: What's Mine is Yours<strong>"All thing bright and beautiful, All creatures great and small, </strong><br /><strong>All things wise and wonderful, The Lord God made them all." </strong><br /><strong><em>Cecil Francis Alexander</em></strong><br /><br />"Shoo!" I continued a futile battle to make the stray pooch leave us alone. My kids and I were visiting the neighborhood park when this slobbering mass of affection intruded on our day. The kids were seven and ten...just old enough to develop persuasive arguments, and they fought valiently to keep this sweet pit bull. I allowed them to give her water and half a sandwich but when we headed home, the love affair was over. Or at least that was my plan. In spite of my best efforts (angry shouts, clapping hands and furious arm waving) the dog followed us home--at a distance.<br /><br />It was hot outside so I sprayed her with the hose--she thought it was a game. I noticed she had full bags of milk. Wondering about her puppies and feeling really sorry for them, I put her in my car and drove her back to the park, hoping she'd go find her babies. Half hour later, she was sitting by the front door. My husband drove around asking if anyone was missing a dog, put up signs and we all searched for her babies. We took her to the vet only to discover that she had not given birth yet. (Yeah, we're city people) "She's really young and this is surely her first litter," he told us. "She'll probably only have one or two."<br /><br />There were already two dogs and two cats in our family, and we didn't need more, but we figured any dog this persistant deserved a chance. We decided to let her deliver her pups, keep them until they were old enough then find good homes for mom and babies. We called her Brinny in honor of her brindle coloring. A couple days later that dog popped out a dozen puppies. Despite her sweet, caring nature, she was simply unable to meet all their needs. After another trip to the doc and the pet store to buy formula and bottles we created a schedule for each of us to take round-the-clock shifts to feed the new family.<br /><br />We only lost one baby (who was accidentally smothered by mama), soon our house looked like a scene from 101 Dalmations...puppies everywhere. They thrived and were adorable in every shape, size and color combination. (I think Brinny was a bit of a free spirit!) Every puppy was adopted, followed by their mom. They each had been given shots, good food and lots of TLC. It cost us a small fortune and disrupted our lives for a couple of months but it's still a favorite memory we frequently recall and re-tell to others.<br /><br />There are many homeless and mistreated dogs and cats in every community. You may not have the time, money or desire to invest as fully as we did in Brinny and her clan, but there are lots of ways to help. Donate a dollar when you buy food at Pets Mart, volunteer a little time at the <a href="http://www.azhumane.org/spayday2010" target="_blank">Humane Society </a>or other "no kill" shelter and don't forget about the local pound. You may not like the idea of supporting this government agency because they do have to euthanize some of the animals and are funded by the tax dollars. But keep in mind that this is a necessary endeavor as long as people don't take care of their animals. You might not like the <br />"Shoo!" I continued a futile battle to make the stray pooch leave us alone. My kids and I were visiting the neighborhood park when this slobbering mass of affection intruded on our day. The kids were seven and ten...just old enough to develop persuasive arguments, and they fought valiently to keep this sweet pit bull. I allowed them to give her water and half a sandwich but when we headed home, the love affair was over. Or at least that was my plan. In spite of my best efforts (angry shouts, clapping hands and furious arm waving) the dog followed us home--at a distance.<br />It was hot outside so I sprayed her with the hose--she thought it was a game. I noticed she had full bags of milk. Wondering about her puppies and feeling really sorry for them, I put her in my car and drove her back to the park, hoping she'd go find her babies. Half hour later, she was sitting by the front door. My husband drove around asking if anyone was missing a dog, put up signs and we all searched for her babies. We took her to the vet only to discover that she had not given birth yet. (Yeah, we're city people) "She's really young and this is surely her first litter," he told us. "She'll probably only have one or two."<br />There were already two dogs and two cats in our family, and we didn't need more, but we figured any dog this persistant deserved a chance. We decided to let her deliver her pups, keep them until they were old enough then find good homes for mom and babies. We called her Brinny in honor of her brindle coloring. A couple days later that dog popped out a dozen puppies. Despite her sweet, caring nature, she was simply unable to meet all their needs. After another trip to the doc and the pet store to buy formula and bottles we created a schedule for each of us to take round-the-clock shifts to feed the new family.<br />We only lost one baby (who was accidentally smothered by mama), soon our house looked like a scene from 101 Dalmations...puppies everywhere. They thrived and were adorable in every shape, size and color combination. (I think Brinny was a bit of a free spirit!) Every puppy was adopted, followed by their mom. They each had been given shots, good food and lots of TLC. It cost us a small fortune and disrupted our lives for a couple of months but it's still a favorite memory we frequently recall and re-tell to others.<br /><br />There are many homeless and mistreated dogs and cats in every community. You may not have the time, money or desire to invest as fully as we did in Brinny and her clan, but there are lots of ways to help. Donate a dollar when you buy food at Pets Mart, volunteer a little time at the <a href="http://www.azhumane.org/spayday2010" target="_blank">Humane Society </a>or other "no kill" shelter and don't forget about the local pound. You may not like the idea of supporting this government agency because they do have to euthanize some of the animals and are funded by the tax dollars. But keep in mind that this is a necessary endeavor as long as people don't take care of their animals. You might not like the <a href="http://www.maricopa.gov/PETS/">pound</a>, but if you ever visit one, it will break your heart. The animals are left in small cells with concrete floors...very hot in summer and cold in winter. They don't have blankets or chew toys or even human affection because the budget is so limited. Consider giving to the pound or volunteering there as well.<br /><br />Assuming you already have favorite places to spend your "giving back" money, a tiny bit more won't likely be noticed and will save the lives of countless animals who contribute so much to the quality of human lives. Any good rescue stories to share (how you saved an animal or one saved you?) Comment on the link below.<br />Diane Markins<br />Here is another simple (FREE) way to help per a reader's comment <a href="http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/home.faces?siteId=3">www.theanimalrescuesite.com</a>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-13392123929707065232010-01-31T06:00:00.000-08:002010-01-31T06:00:00.835-08:00Obedience Doesn't Have to be Fun<div width="100%" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-style: normal; text-decoration: none;"><b>"We can do this the easy way or the hard way; it's up to you." My version of God's message about obedience<br /><br /></b></div> <span style="color:#000000;">"Whoa, Nellie," I said to my husband. "Slow this trail ride down." Not enjoying where the conversation was headed, I was hoping we could change the subject or at least agree to disagree.<br /><br />"When my dad retires in a few months, I really need you to step in and work at <a target="_blank" href="http://www.ambolts.com">the business</a>," he responded, not getting the hint. "I know you've never really wanted to be involved because mixing too much family and business can cause problems, but Dad'll be gone." Then he played his ace, "And I need you."<span><br /><br /></span>I'm a journalist and a public relations practitioner, not a...well, whatever I'd be at the business. Besides, I don't know much about nuts and bolts. Without product knowledge, how much help could I be? I continued to have this silent dialogue with God, trying to convince Him that He'd made a silly little mistake and he'd passed the crazy notion on to my husband. I continued resisting until God's persistent push was about to land me on my face.<span><br /><br /></span>"OK, I'll work in our family business, but I'm not necessarily going to like it," I said. Both of them (God and my husband) were agreeable with my terms. I slowly learned the difference between screws and bolts, how to identify materials and measurement specs. It was like learning a new language. I worked in the inclement warehouse (sweltering heat in the summer and numbing cold in the winter), learning how to package and stock items on the shelves or how to pull orders. I began helping customers on the phone and at the counter. I learned how to drive the delivery truck and write up invoices.<span><br /><br /></span>That was several years ago. While I'll never be the fastener industry expert my husband is, I can get by running the place if I absolutely have to. Our son works in the business now and I'm not required to be as involved. (Whew!)<span><br /><br /></span>The point? Sometimes we have to do things we really don't want to do. If God is telling us it's what He wants, resisting will only delay the inevitable. Leviticus 26:3-20 spells it all out clearly: If we obey God, He'll bless us (in the short or long haul) beyond anything we could imagine. If we don't, we can expect some bad stuff like "sudden terror, wasting diseases and fever that will destroy our sight and drain away our lives." Ewww<br /><br /><span></span>I pick <i>option A</i>. If God wants me to serve in a new way, remain in an uncomfortable job, befriend an unpleasant person or sacrifice my possessions, I'm in. I've seen God's power and ability to get my attention. He lets us choose— the easy way or the hard way. I pick <i>A</i>. How about you?</span>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-43413413710427385902010-01-24T06:00:00.000-08:002010-01-24T06:00:02.880-08:00Motoring Through Life<p><span style="color:#000000;">True Confession: Alternating between applying a final coat of mascara and sipping coffee as I dashed to work, it suddenly occurred to me that I was exceeding the speed limit. (Note to self: If I get out the door a little sooner I can relax as I head off to where I'm going.) I am typically a really careful driver but on this day I was just cramming too much in and confess to not being as wise as I should have. <i>Oooh, I'd better slow down </i>I thought<i>,</i> recalling that the police sometimes set traps in this area to issue citations. </span></p> <p><span style="color:#000000;">In this same little neighborhood is a sign that says, "It's our town, please slow down." This is intended to remind motorists that the people living in this quiet residential area want to protect what's important to them (children, animals, property) from irresponsible drivers. </span></p> <p><span style="color:#000000;">In life we rush and hurry. We try to pack as much in as possible and blast off to the next thing. If we'd consider some of the rules of the road, perhaps they'd help us to arrive at our intended destinations in a more timely and productive manner.</span></p> <ol start="1" type="1"><li><span style="color:#000000;"><i>Stay in your own lane</i>. If we mind our own business and not try to "help" others take care of theirs, we're less likely to have collisions.</span></li><li><span style="color:#000000;"><i>Watch the road: Don't let your latte, radio buttons or cell phone distract you</i>. When we remain focused on the job at hand and intent upon accomplishing a specific purpose we'll finish well and without undesired dents and damage.</span></li><li><span style="color:#000000;"><i>Don't exceed the posted speed limit</i>. When we make realistic plans and do our best to honor them, less rushing is required. This results in a less stressful trip through our day.</span></li><li><span style="color:#000000;"><i>Be courteous to fellow drivers</i>. Just as there are days when we are in high speed mode, others find themselves stressed and pressured sometimes too. When they whiz by, bumping and knocking us off balance, grace and kindness are always the best responses. (Avoid honking or hand gestures!) </span></li><li><span style="color:#000000;"><i>When you're headed in the wrong direction, find a place to make a U turn or find an alternate route to get back on track</i>. Everyone makes mistakes, but if we keep moving forward instead of correcting and re-directing, we'll never get where we'd really like to be.</span></li><li><span style="color:#000000;"><i>Merge carefully into traffic</i>. As we arrive at work, school or come home to be with the family, things are already in motion. It helps to look around and join people in progress rather than expecting them to align with the pace or mood we come in with. (Unless their realignment is a necessary improvement and you facilitate this by bringing the mood UP.)</span></li></ol> <p><span style="color:#000000;">There are many others, but these a few good road rules to use on your journey. As you go through your busy days this week, pay extra attention to the traffic signs (life principles) put in place to keep you safe and help get you where you're going without running out of gas. As you do your part, you ensure that others arrive in good shape as well. </span></p> <span style="color:#000000;">Can you think of other driving tips that could be applied to daily living? Share your brilliant insights below!<br />Diane Markins<br /></span>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-64941800429636570672010-01-17T06:00:00.000-08:002010-01-18T06:44:17.805-08:00Blissfully United (By a Game?)<b>Intensely Shared Joy--and No one Drank the Koolaid<br /><br /></b> <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">There's nothing that compares to the experience of being in a giant stadium filled with passionate, like-minded people who are directing all their energy into <i>one </i>thing. In this case, I'm talking about the<a href="http://www.citizen-times.com/article/20100112/COLUMNISTS01/301120031"> </a><a target="_blank" href="http://www.citizen-times.com/article/20100112/COLUMNISTS01/301120031">Cardinals playoff game</a> I attended January 10th against the Packers. Everything is in sync—color (red), sound (collective cheering, groaning or silence), mirrored facial expressions and people slapping the hands of total strangers passing their aisle or sitting in their vicinity. The over-riding feeling? Unity. There is a "we" mentality. </span> <p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Yes, there were the little specs of green and gold and the occasional guy with a giant wedge of cheese on his head who was out of sync with the rest of the crowd, but that was the exception. Most of the folks were there with one thing in mind; a win for <i>their</i> team— <i>our</i> team. We owned every mistake as though we had committed it and we embraced every successful play as if we were on the field in full gear. The fans were team members, not spectators, as we participated in a game that ended with a collective (record) score of 96 points.<span><br /></span></span></p> <p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Driving away, I could hear the deafening roar of that crowd (nearly half a mile from the stadium) even after the game had been over for several minutes. People didn't want the excitement of victory as such a shared experience to end. </span></p> <p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Why is it that this happens only in sports? I know that there are other events (like political conventions or spiritual retreats) where like-minded people are passionate about one thing, but it's never as universal or as raw as a major game. With religion and politics, even within the same denomination or party there are microcosms of those who vary in thought and conviction. There's seldom that intense level of unbridled joy and support flowing in the same direction. Some hold back, some are luke-warm, others are over the moon. </span></p> <p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Sadly this is true of life in general. You might think that because people have something in common, they'd be in full agreement and deeply enthusiastic. Not so. Gender? Women have widely varying opinions from each other and so do men. Age, race, religion, home town? Same thing applies. </span></p> <p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I'm always a little surprised by the response mail to my newspaper column. One is wildly supportive and a kindred spirit. The next is full of venom and tells me how simple I am. These are mostly from people in my own community, so we obviously don't all agree based on geography. More stunning is email from my blog posts. These are supposedly people who see things from a similar world view (because most of them subscribe or at least visit often). Occasionally there is a nasty note about how wrong I am from inside the ranks. And that could be about the weather.</span></p><p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I know that in this life everyone will never stand together in full agreement, hold hands and sing Amazing Grace. I'm counting on heaven for that experience. I certainly don't have answers about why we can't all come together on more issues or why there seems to be an ease of passion when it comes to discord.</span></p> <p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">My point is that great unified passion does exist on earth and I've experienced it first-hand with gratitude and awe. It's a feeling that is difficult to duplicate or surpass. While I certainly wish it could consistently encompass areas of life other than sports, for now, I'll take what I can get and enjoy the afterglow. <i>Thanks God!</i><br /></span></p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Have you encountered this type of overwhelming group experience of intensely shared purpose and emotion? Do you have thoughts on why it's so rare outside of sports or why sports can be the catalyst?<br /><a href="http://www.dianemarkins.com/">Diane Markins</a><br /></span>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-62007967043779325282010-01-10T06:01:00.000-08:002010-01-10T21:08:20.820-08:00When All We Hear From God is Silence<div width="100%" style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-style: normal; text-decoration: none;font-family:Arial;font-size:10pt;"><b><span style="font-size:130%;">Can You Hear Me <i>Now</i>, God?</span><br /><br /></b></div> <span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">It happens to every single person alive...even those whom theretofore hadn't prayed. A time of desperation or longing when we cry out to God: <i>Fix this. Change this. Heal this</i>. And we hear nothing in response. What does it mean when God is silent in the face of our anguished pleas? Does it mean He doesn't care, or worse, He doesn't even </span><i style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">exist</i><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">?</span> <p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">I've experienced the quiet echoes of prayers unanswered. When my mother lay in her hospital bed unconscious, doctors explained that her brain was dead and she'd never wake up. I begged God to prove them wrong. She never again responded to my voice or looked into my eyes and soon slipped away from this world permanently while God was silent. </p> <p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">When my daughter was just moving into her teen years and began battling serious health issues I fasted and prayed all the time for her to be healed. There were several years of painful uncertainty while God never seemed to offer a response. Was He too busy? Didn't He care? Was it too difficult for Him?</p> <p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">As Jesus went to the Garden of Gethsemane and asked God to change his circumstances, only to receive silence in response, I have to wonder if those same questions flitted through his mind. Even if they did, the truth won out as Jesus accepted this silence as temporary. He knew God was there and would take him through the trial. </p> <p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">There can be various reasons for God's silence. Perhaps He's spoken often in the past and we didn't pay attention. Perhaps He wants us to pursue a difficult path without easing the load to gain strength and stamina. Maybe He's teaching us that we have to trust Him even unto death—of a loved one or even our own. </p> <p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">His love, mercy and power don't exist solely when we can hear God's voice or feel His presence. Similarly, our faith (by definition) needs to remain in tact even when difficult circumstances don't change and we aren't "hearing" God's response to our pleading cries. </p> <p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Christians are quick to share stories of answered prayers and feel-good "miracles" but not so verbal about times when pain and strife persisted in spite of faithful prayer. These stories are just as important because the outcome for those who remain faithful is still victory. God will eventually let His presence be felt and His voice be heard again when the waiting is over. Only He knows why and when. What we do know is that He is suffering along with us, even in His silence. </p> <p style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">If you are hearing echoes of your own prayers right now, don't lose faith. Be encouraged that even in His silence God stands with you. He is teaching you, refining you and making you more grace-filled. Be assured that some day you will have a story to share of answered prayer, because the silence isn't permanent. It's only a pause. In my case, I later realized that He was whispering to me all along that my mom was fine...she was stepping into His arms. And my daughter's health crisis abated, shaping her into a more courageous and faith-filled adult. </p> Have you ever experienced God's silence? Did your faith waver? Did He ever speak up?Share your story here.<br />Diane MarkinsDiane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-16563016456067862542010-01-03T06:01:00.000-08:002010-01-03T06:01:00.349-08:00Say it Obama: "You're Fired!"<div width="100%" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-style: normal; text-decoration: none;"><b>Nuts and Bolts of Running our Country<br /><br /></b></div> <span style="color:#000000;">My husband and I own a <a target="_blank" href="http://www.ambolts.com/">small business</a>. He is the president of the company and oversees the day-to-day operations. We wholesale fasteners— <i>nuts and bolts</i>, and do a small amount of custom manufacturing, mostly for the construction industry. </span> <p><span style="color:#000000;">An engineer designs plans to build a bridge, and then he gives those plans to a contractor, who gives a list of materials to a purchasing agent. This person gets quotes from all his suppliers for every item on the list. Nuts and bolts are typically at the bottom of the list both in cost and in the minds of those planning the project. However, they are absolutely necessary to hold the foundational pieces together. </span></p> <p><span style="color:#000000;">When the purchasing agent communicates with us about the fasteners required, we provide the company with a cost and time-line to meet his needs. With all these people involved, each having their own demands, priorities and areas of expertise, it would be easy to have miscommunications. Someone could forget to indicate a need for a particular strength or misread plans and the length they order from us is a tiny fraction too short. </span></p> <p><span style="color:#000000;">Fortunately, complications like this are very rare. However, if they do occur, the cost is ridiculously high. No one is foolish enough to risk a bridge collapsing or a building crumbling, so things would be torn down and redone. Also, those involved would certainly lose their jobs.</span></p> <p><span style="color:#000000;">Sounding familiar? On Christmas day, in spite of watch lists and warnings by a terrorist's own father, there was a major breakdown in the system. Lives could have been lost. Our President is wagging his finger and his tongue about how terrible it is, but no one has been held responsible. No one has been fired for their dismal job performance. </span></p> <p><span style="color:#000000;">Instead, millions of innocent travelers will be inconvenienced by yet another <a target="_blank" href="http://news.firedoglake.com/2009/12/30/failed-christmas-day-terror-attack-could-lead-to-major-changes-in-intelligence-security/">silly protocol change on airlines</a>. Once again, the tail wags the dog. I can only imagine Al Qadea operatives sitting around yucking it up about the hoops they're making us jump through. "Let's use toe nail polish next time...hehehe."</span></p> <p><span style="color:#000000;">If only the security of our nation was as meticulously run as construction projects in the U.S., where even the nuts and bolts get proper attention...</span></p> <span style="color:#000000;">Do you agree? Do you know of any industry or business where people wouldn't lose their jobs for such failings? Comment below.<br />Diane Markins<br /></span>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8727707849242997136.post-52716090473801676012009-12-27T06:01:00.000-08:002009-12-27T06:01:00.533-08:00Hope and Change in 2010<div width="100%" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-style: normal; text-decoration: none;"><b>Are you filling up your hope bank?<br /><br /></b></div> <font color="#000000"><i>Hope and change</i>. We all need to believe in those things. Not rhetoric or campaign slogans. This isn't about politics, I'm talking about life. Unless your life if 100% perfect, this applies to you. Every single one of us could use improvement in at least one area and having hope is what helps us hold on until circumstances are altered. </font> <p><font color="#000000">As we begin the last week of 2009 perhaps there will be time to reflect about all that's happened this year. What changes can you make to correct problems? What decisions can you rethink in order to not repeat bad choices?</font></p> <p><font color="#000000">Many of life's challenges are out of our control. Unkind spouses, rebellious adult children, serious illness and loss of jobs are only a few. Are you still hopeful for change or has your hope begun to evaporate like steam from a tea pot? What are you doing to foster hope? If you don't take care of it, hope will disappear entirely. </font></p> <p><font color="#000000">Here are a few suggestions (for even the most happy and optimistic people) to nurture their "hope bank." </font></p> <ul type="square"><li><font color="#000000">Keep a journal that only includes the good things that happen (even the tiniest)</font></li><li><font color="#000000">Reflect on times in the past when a positive change has happened to you</font></li><li><font color="#000000">Fill your mind with uplifting thoughts (be aware of when your mind starts to go down a path of despair and reroute your thinking)</font></li><li><font color="#000000">Be certain that your circle of friends includes at least one person who always has encouraging things to say (the more of these friends the better...be sure to return the favor instead of draining them!) If you're lacking these types of friendships, be intentional about pursuing new ones.</font></li><li><font color="#000000">Read the Bible. It is full of stories of amazing change to inspire more faith...hope and faith are partners.</font></li><li><font color="#000000">Read a book of Bible promises as a reminder of what God <i>can </i>and says He <i>will </i>do.</font></li><li><font color="#000000">Pray. Pour your heart's desires out to the Lord. Let it be a time of emotional cleansing if you need it. Don't stop after you've told Him what you want to change. Listen to what He might be telling you in answer to your plea. Write it down as a letter from God to you. </font></li><li><font color="#000000">Think and talk about the future in terms of already having arrived at a better place in life. "<i>When</i> I'm feeling better..." or "<i>When</i> my husband agrees to counseling..." Don't limit yourself to wishful or "if only" statements. </font></li></ul> <p><font color="#000000">I recently saw this quote but don't know the author: "If nothing was ever allowed to change, where would butterflies come from?" </font></p> <p><font color="#000000">I pray that in 2010 you see many new butterflies in your life. Happy New Year.</font></p> <p><font color="#000000">Diane Markins</font></p>Diane Markinshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13090334941523457539noreply@blogger.com3