Hope and Change in 2010

Are you filling up your hope bank?

Hope and change. We all need to believe in those things. Not rhetoric or campaign slogans. This isn't about politics, I'm talking about life. Unless your life if 100% perfect, this applies to you. Every single one of us could use improvement in at least one area and having hope is what helps us hold on until circumstances are altered.

As we begin the last week of 2009 perhaps there will be time to reflect about all that's happened this year. What changes can you make to correct problems? What decisions can you rethink in order to not repeat bad choices?

Many of life's challenges are out of our control. Unkind spouses, rebellious adult children, serious illness and loss of jobs are only a few. Are you still hopeful for change or has your hope begun to evaporate like steam from a tea pot? What are you doing to foster hope? If you don't take care of it, hope will disappear entirely.

Here are a few suggestions (for even the most happy and optimistic people) to nurture their "hope bank."

• Keep a journal that only includes the good things that happen (even the tiniest)
• Reflect on times in the past when a positive change has happened to you
• Fill your mind with uplifting thoughts (be aware of when your mind starts to go down a path of despair and reroute your thinking)
• Be certain that your circle of friends includes at least one person who always has encouraging things to say (the more of these friends the better...be sure to return the favor instead of draining them!) If you're lacking these types of friendships, be intentional about pursuing new ones.
• Read the Bible. It is full of stories of amazing change to inspire more faith...hope and faith are partners.
• Read a book of Bible promises as a reminder of what God can and says He will do.
• Pray. Pour your heart's desires out to the Lord. Let it be a time of emotional cleansing if you need it. Don't stop after you've told Him what you want to change. Listen to what He might be telling you in answer to your plea. Write it down as a letter from God to you.
• Think and talk about the future in terms of already having arrived at a better place in life. "When I'm feeling better..." or "When my husband agrees to counseling..." Don't limit yourself to wishful or "if only" statements.

I recently saw this quote but don't know the author: "If nothing was ever allowed to change, where would butterflies come from?"

I pray that in 2010 you see many new butterflies in your life. Happy New Year.

Diane Markins

What's Done is Done

What's done is done. I'm not talking about accepting consequences or painful circumstances. I'm being literal. As of today (December 20^th), what I've gotten done is all that's getting done for Christmas this year.

In years past I'm typically bouncing around like a monkey on speed by this date. I dart from one store to the next looking for stocking stuffers, a wish-list item, something to wear to a party or ingredients for a dish I still have to prepare.

This year I'm going to sit down with a cup of eggnog and watch an old Christmas movie—maybe even two, then take a nap and maybe bake some cookies...because those are things I enjoy. Some of my friends may even get a plate of cookies (if I don't eat all of them myself), some may not...hopefully they know I love them even if the cookies aren't on time.

I'm going to do a little service work, distributing toys at the Salvation Army warehouse and at church on Christmas Eve. I'm not going to be rushed or upset that I have to fit those things in because I'm eliminating other things that don't matter as much.

In lieu of the gifts I was unable to purchase, I'm going to make up a hand-written gift certificate (no fancy computer graphics)...just a simple explanation of what I want to give. I'll pay up and they know where to find me.

I may take a leisurely drive to enjoy Christmas lights or sit outside with my husband by the chiminea (a portable clay fireplace from Mexico) with a cup of cocoa. I won't be wrapping after midnight or cooking at two a.m. If I'm up early it will be to spend a little extra quiet time alone with God.

My dogs may get a bath and (adorned with a bow) they might get to strut around the neighborhood. We'll wish everyone we meet a Merry Christmas. I will make some phone calls to check in with loved ones far away, skipping the Ecards because it is so delightful to hear their voices.

I won't worry about anything that wasn't done by today, including a longer blog post. I hope you are done too, and I wish you a blessed and peaceful Christmas.

Diane Markins

The Cross: Still Meaningful?

Art, Symbol, Legacy...You Decide

Crosses are very popular. A statement of faith, or not—they hang on chains, adorning movie stars, characters on TV shows, country singers and rap artists. Limitless in style, shape, design and color, each represents artistic uniqueness.

But while these may only look like diverse pieces of jewelry to the casual observer, the reality is that their origins reveal a rich and powerful legacy. In Judith Couchman's new book, The Mystery of the Cross; Bringing Ancient Christian Images to Life (IVP), we get a glimpse into the myriad meanings of the cross through history via her short study of 40 images. Crosses represented all that Christians believed and how they approached life. They were significant, not just an accessory or bling.

When I picked up the book I was immediately drawn to number 19, A Cross in the Desert because I live smack in the middle of one. She describes in poetic detail the hope instilled in ancient travelers as they arrived at Mount Sinai's Saint Catherine's Monastery and looked upon the "Sinai Christ." This iconic carving depicts a life-sized Jesus holding the Gospel with a jewel-encrusted cross on the cover. Can you imagine the impact this would have had on depleted, road-weary pilgrims as they first laid eyes on it?

Couchman talks about the tradition of taking times of solitude in the desert to separate from the distractions of life. The heat, the absence of life-giving water and even the quiet make the desert an unappealing choice. But sometimes a bit of stark, harsh isolation is the only thing that will ultimately draw us back to the foot of the true cross. She expresses the value of her own experiences in the desert, encouraging diversion-challenged Believers to consider their own pilgrimage, however brief.

In number 26, Coins for the Kingdom, she paints a picture of the significance of the cross on ancient Roman currency:

In our own uncertain times, Roman "cross coins" speak to us about the true source of security. Ultimately, we can't depend on coins or paper money or employment or prosperity to provide daily necessities or secure the future...When economies falter, we're led back to Christ's words. His promise of provision transcends the transition of world leaders, the pillage of empires and the collapse of economies. He assures us: in God we can trust.

Remember the rich heritage of the cross when you see it dangling from an earlobe, decorating an Easter cookie or shining atop the roof of your church. Take a few seconds to consider the story and the mystery it represents. Don't disregard or disrespect its significance—artistically or as a tangible symbol of hope to people throughout history.

Whether you're a history buff, an art lover or a person who is merely curious about the origins and meaning of this enduring symbol of faith, The Mystery of the Cross is interesting, enlightening and inspirational. It can be found at your local bookstore, on the internet or at InterVarsity Press online.

What comes to mind as you think of the cross? Do you have a favorite image or piece of jewelry? Has it become passé or secular? Is it important to you to preserve its iconic significance? Comment below.

Diane Markins

Give Me a Break!

Some Thoughts on West and Wewaxation (as Elmer Fudd would say)

As a child my models for being a wife and mom (my mother and grandmother) were servants first. They met every need the family had, served in church and took care of extended family as well as neighbors in need. They prepared meals others enjoyed (no thought to their own preferences), took the drumstick instead of the breast, and often insisted their family rest and leave chores to them.

In the early days of caring for my own home and family I applied these same methods. I remember one day, when I was pregnant with my second child, waking up face-down on my bed in a pile of clean laundry—one sock still in my hand. I had simply collapsed from exhaustion.

Fortunately, my husband had a different kind of role model and (with on-going battles) he helped me learn that caring for everyone-all-the-time wasn't in my job description; that my loved ones were capable and needed to take more responsibility.

I was admittedly a slow learner, and a bit stubborn, but as time went on I learned there was much freedom and peace for all of us when I let people do their own jobs. Letting go of guilt as I rested and watched others labor was tough initially, but each time I saw their satisfied faces when they had accomplished something on their own, it became a little easier.

Following is an excerpt from Joan C. Webb's book It's a Wonderful (Imperfect) Life: Devotional Readings for Women Who Strive Too Hard to Make it Just Right (Regal, 2009). I was delighted to participate in Joan's Blog tour. For tomorrow's stop, click here and this link will show you the whole schedule. As a recovering work-aholic and perfectionist, Joan has been a powerful inspiration to me.

Diane Markins

Rest Regardless

He restores my soul. Psalm 23:3

"Whenever I say I need to rest or take a nap, I get dirty looks from my family," said a coaching client. "This pushes my button and keeps me moving. Lately I've realized I let their reactions control me. Should I stop to rest even if they don't like it?"

This reminded me of a conversation I had with an executive friend who said, "God has specifically told me to take care of myself this year and stop doing for everybody else what they can do for themselves or what someone other than me can do to help. He assured me he doesn't want me to work so hard that my health is negatively affected. I will obey him and include space and rest into my life. But here's the rub: Others don't appreciate that I've changed my modus operandi. I'm getting flack."

I understand. Some of us have taught others that we're super-women—willing, skilled and available to make life easier for them. When this is the case, it is unlikely they'll suggest we relax, or be pleased if we choose to take time off. But here's what my client and the executive—and I—have learned: We don't have to wait until someone else notices our exhaustion and suggests we take a break. God grants us permission to take responsibility for ourselves. He loves to replenish our souls, and we can cooperate with Him regardless of what others say or do.

Lord, I want a balanced life of doing, trusting and resting.

*Bonus: If you post a comment you'll be entered in a drawing to receive a signed copy of the book! (Make sure I can contact you) DM